27.6.08

The Laziest Gal in the Northern Hemisphere

Why, just the title of this blog pooped me right out. Thinking about it now demands a half hour nap. I will have to set all that aside however and complete a sentence or two. Do the cyber gods know how many blogs I may have created then forgot passwords to & now they are floating around thinking I have died? Sometimes that is better. Most web logs are so boring and tedious (including this one) it makes no fucking difference whether we are dead or alive. In fact, if someone started up a web log with the title "writing this while dead" I might change my mind & say that web logs are a little interesting.
I have to rest.

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Recommendations

  • GO to: Paris. New York. Montreal. London. Tokyo. Amsterdam. Berlin. A blue collar bar. A cafe. Martini Bar. A Rainforest. A Desert. The Prairies. The Metro. A neglected cemetary. A casino. A used bookstore. A whaling town. Art Galleries. Readings. Walk for the sake of it. Go with a dog.
  • Try anything once but don't jump on a bandwagon. Smoke if you want to. Exercise. Sleep with your window slightly opened. Mingle with strangers, spend as much times as possible with dogs. Be tender and tread lightly. Look around as if it is your first day on earth. Or your last.
  • Read Moby Dick to learn to look below the surface. Read Ralph Ellison's The Invisible Man because once you find out who you are, you will be free. Read Nabokov's Lolita to feel uncomfortable. Read Kafka to experience, Chekov to witness(& for a lesson in short story writing) Cormac McCarthy and Joyce to ditch the annoying quotations, Pico Iyer to taste places. Try Chuck Palhaniuk to laugh while squirming, Aimee Bender to dance by her notes of imagination, pick up poetry by Atwood, Billy Collins, Anne Sexton, ee cummings, pablo neruda. Pick up a poet each day, they need a ride in your mind.
  • Films: Sprited Away by Hayayo Miyuzaki (listed first for a reason) Double Indemnity 1948, All About Eve, The Dreamers, Lawrence of Arabia, Gladiator, Zoolander (the same night as you watch the previous) The Saddest Music in the World by Guy Maddin, film genius of our time, Bladerunner, Brazil and also Tideland by Terry Gilliam(the latter, shot in Saskatchewan where land was an ocean) any water film with Esther Williams to make you feel better. That goes for ALL Doris Day and Rock Hudson films, then Calamity Jane for the sapphic subtext, anything with Greta Garbo (watching it in perspective of how closeted lesbians were then) Robert Mitchim in a white jacket or pants, smoking. Mildred Pierce, The Ghost and Mrs. Muir for nostalgia sake.
  • Listen to Nina Simone, Billy Holiday, Morrissey, Daniel Belanger, Miles Davis, Parov Stelar, Hawksley Workman, Andrew Bird, Bebel Gilberto, Cocteau Twins (yes, even now), Holly Cole, Charlie Parker, Thelonius Monk, Thievery Corporation, Patricia Barber, Lucinda Williams, Sly & the Family Stone, Ella Fitzgerald and anything by Cole Porter, the Operas Lakme, Norma, the song Summertime sung by anyone, played on repeat until your cells are hot.
  • Read Haruki Murakami, esp. Wind-up Bird Chronicles and Harboiled Wonderland and the End of the World
  • View the artist Takashi Murakami because he will blow your mind and start your engines. He is electric.
  • Read Patricia Highsmith, esp. The Two Faces of Forgery, Edith, all of her short stories and of couse all of the Ripley books.
  • View the artist Fernando Botero because his portraits will make you feel thin and his body of work will make you feel vast.
  • Read all the noir fiction you can beginning with Raymond Chandler, Jim Thompson, then discover Michael Dibdin and Sebastian Japrisot
  • Drink Espresso as often as possible but make it correctly. Drink red wines from Argentina, Chile, New Zealand, France, Whites from France, Australia or New Zealand and yes, from Canada. Drink as much Belgian Beer as possible. MGD is good too.